Solo Survivor

To work or not to work…

It’s been a few weeks of ups and downs. Started with a phone call to say that they were looking to let people go who were unassigned for a long stretch. Given that it’s been a little over 5 months since I had any work to do, it probably meant that I would be another victim of the off shoring of IT jobs. Let me add that in the time, no-one has spoken to us, had a meeting with us. In fact, they seem to have forgotten they even have people with our expertise in WA.

Mentally I prepared myself. Then came another call “we’ve found some work for you”. OK good. Turns out they were asking the impossible so back to unassigned. So it’s been like that for the a couple of weeks – you have work, no you don’t, yes you do. The back and forth has landed me on this spot of now having work to do but the back and forth has left me less than inspired or enthusiastic.

I am now part of team who I will never meet as they are all based in Sydney or Auckland, and I am not sure how long the gig will last until I am back to being unassigned. I have been given a couple of little things to do but it’s hard to see where this will lead. I am used to being busy at work so this is painful to say the least.

Mean while, I am severely stressed. I am not sleeping well – even my colleagues are commenting on how tired I look – and have no appetite. I have done exactly 7 hours of real work this year, and that hesitantly as I am losing confidence.

On the plus side, I am still getting paid. I can still have my Wednesdays at home. I can still pay my mortgage and bills. I have a lot to be thankful for so am trying to practice gratitude every day regardless of how I feel. Now I need to decide how badly my mental health is suffering and if the price is getting to be too high. I need to find meaning in life outside of work.

3 Comments

  1. Danelle

    Meaning outside of work. That sounds like a great direction to head. Xx

    Reply
  2. Angie Van Greuning

    Hello precious friend!
    So great to see another blog from you. I can just imagine how frustrating it is to have this up and down situation going at work. And to go from such busyness to literally a grinding halt,,sure is taxing mentally and emotionally and physically!

    I am so sorry to hear that you not sleeping or eating much. And I will be praying for you much more now that I know exactly what to pray for.

    I think you have hit the nail on the head, to try find meaning outside of your work. You are a very caring and loving person who has a great deal of love to give others. And there are so many who would desperately need the love of God that flows through you.

    Just know that you matter my friend! You really do matter! I have personally been in about 18 months of dealing with my health, Rachel sudden passing, my moms situation which adds it’s own long list of problems or rather let’s say challenges.

    And I have no idea what the future holds. But all I know for sure, is that God holds my future in His heart and hands….and I know He hold your too precious friend!

    I pray that He will heal you, lead you and guide you!

    I love how uou always see the positive side! You are an inspiration even when you might not think you are.

    Love you so much precious Su! Hugs from Cape Town!

    Love Ang
    ♡♡♡

    Reply
  3. Lorna Mead

    For such an active mind as yours. having no work is crippling. It.s hard for others to fully understand this, and they can become judgemental. So start learning something new. Find your passion and follow that. Take heart we are all praying for you. You are one of the brightest jewels in God’s treasure chest. Love you.

    Reply

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