Solo Survivor

Christmas Eve

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Christmas Eve is a day of mixed emotions for me. First of it is my brother’s birthday and I am flooded with memories of him and I feel afresh the loss. This year it also marks the 44th anniversary of our adoption – happy adoption day siblings. I have wondered many times over the years how different my life would have been if not for my mom and dad. Would I have even known or remembered my siblings? Where would I be, what would I be doing, what would my name be?

I always try to do something different to mark this day as I remember Terry and also the life we had as a family. Although we adopted my dad’s surname years before, this is the day it became legally ours. I am grateful that I grew up knowing my siblings – we so could have been separated at an early age and not been able to keep track of each other.

In years past, I would meet up with my nephew and we would go out for dinner and remember his dad together. Sadly we have lost contact so won’t be doing that this year. I prefer to phone my family on this day instead of Christmas Day. I was supposed to have the day off but at last minute had to go in to work for the morning. But then half a day is still better than a full one and I went in 2.5 hours later than I normally do.

Not quite sure what I am going with the rest of day but already I am full of memories and thankfulness. I am grateful to have had a brother like Terry – I miss him today but have a smile on my face as I remember the fun times we had together. I will eat some watermelon in honour of my favourite memory of him and watch a comedy as I remember his infectious laugh. I’ll have a mince pie and play some Christmas carols really loud and sing along. It’s not a day to mourn but to celebrate – five lives that were forever changed 44 years ago.

1 Comment

  1. Angie

    My precious friend!

    Happy birthday to your brother in Heaven! And happy adoption day! Whoo! Whoo! What an incredible thing to celebrate!

    I honour you for having watermelon for one of your favourite memories with your brother! And that you watched something funny!

    I know you miss him lots Su! And I honour you for celebrating his memory, not mourning the loss.

    Can you imagine the watermelon he had in Heaven! Wow!

    Love your blogs Su! You are so real and authentic!

    Love Ang
    xxx

    Reply

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